The day is bright. The street is glowing. Its a beutiful day in Humacao, Puerto Rico. The smell gasoline brought me to a worn down golf cart. And I decided to drive the green golfcart to the beach.
As i drove through the steep hills i noticed all the people outside heading to the beach as well. All the palmtrees were protecting me from the blazing hot sun.
I arrived at the beach and there was the remnant of a bar that was lost in a hurricane. The sand was scorching hot. The people were happy and having fun. I felt sweat drops fall from my chin and onto the fiery sand. The ocean was calm and relaxing.
I saw my family. There were seven of us under the protective shade of the palm tree. Sitting on the cool sand. Enjoying the view of Vieques, and island in the distance.
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ReplyDeleteI like how you use a lot of adjectives to describe the city and how you used the 5 senses to describe the city even further. One thing you could improve on is the flow of the story as right now it jumps from one place to another frequently. There is good language techniques for example the use of the word crappy which is informal writing.
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