Thursday, November 18, 2021

Amsterdam or AmsterDAMN

My slumber was interrupted by the sound of singing birds. As I leave my townhouse, a whiff of fresh coffee dances around in my nostrils. My eyes are blinded by the colorful array of buildings sitting next to one another as if they were one giant painting. Lahore's houses were so big and unique, but Amsterdam's are tall and lively. So different, but it is the same calm chill that puts my mind to sleep. Oh, Amsterdam, a blonde woman with a checkered scarf and a warm smile that calms me down whenever I'm lost. Was it right or wrong to leave my woman for another? Neither, because Lahore still lives on in my soul. Neither because Lahore resonate within Amsterdam and me.
Word Count: 123

8 comments:

  1. The writer did use a lot of technique from Lahore, they found a new love in Amsterdam which shows how they are slowly moving past their other love. I really enjoyed this blog because it spoke very deep in all 5 senses. Something I would improve in is maybe diving the paragraphs a bit more and creating little ones but overall I enjoyed it very much.

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  2. - The writer did capture the author's voice and he captured the techniques as well.
    - The writer could create more little paragraphs instead of such long ones.
    - The writer uses a lot of techniques and they all make sense and have a strong purpose.

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  3. The writer captured the city and his/her feelings for the city throughly
    the writer could've explained more throughly his/her ideas instead of changing them so fast
    This paragraphs is written in first person and has an active voice

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  4. I really think you followed the prompt really well, and I think the imagery and your language were on point. I'd divide the paragraph into smaller chunks though to make things easier to read

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  5. I think this writer did a pretty good job at portraying the first author's voice; in fact the use of specific symbols making reference to the original tex. Furthermore, the writer did an splendid job ticking to the blog genre using vivid imagery as well as sensory imagery that made me feel as if I was exploring and visiting Amsterdam in person. I think the writer did a great job, my only comment or advice would be to add a picture.

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  6. I think the writer captured the voice and technique of a blog post effectively. The descriptions are great and the imagery is descriptive. The tone and structured used in the blog tied with the nostalgic feeling in the Lahore blog. Overall, this blog was well written and easier to read and understand.

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  7. The writer was able to effectively capture the voice and techniques of the previous author. It also used many blog elements like a successful title and having many descriptions and imagery. However, if there's one thing to change it would be the structure of the blog. Blogs are typically in short paragraph form. This would make it easier to read and more organized.

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  8. The writer here was able to mimic the original author in their writing very well. They also did a good job in using the blog elements, such as asking questions, which interacts with the audience on a closer level.

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